before i head to bed, i wanna give thanks. thanks to whoever's been hearing and answering my prayers, i don't know who, but maybe credits to 11:11, or eyelashes or anita and amora who's been giving me great advices. ok this sounds really silly but when you're helpless, you will turn to just whoever that you think may help you. glad to say, my darker days are finally over. right now i am so contented with my life, i shan't go into details cus blogging often jinx it i dont know why. anyway finally things are back on the track and i believe that there are better days to come. so thanks to everyone who has been there for me once again, you guys are a big help. here's a GREAT hug, i love you guys. thank you so much. 

 letsfallinlovetogether.tumblr.com

better go get ready now, meeting my girls for dinner :)

I'm really really happy and contented how things has turned out during these two days. Somehow, it was even more than what I've expected. Sam asked if I'm finally feeling secured now, I thought so, but I'm still afraid. I know his feelings now and I'm really glad, but when I think about the fact that he's still not mine, I'm still afraid. It's like you're grabbing onto something but you can lose grip of it anytime. I don't like this feeling but I know I shouldn't complain anymore. From zero to what I have now, I've put in so much effort. I have to remind myself that I should be contented, 'cause if I complain about what I have now, they might just take everything away and I can't afford that to happen.

Aside from that, I feel blessed these days. Have you ever spend time with someone so special that you think you guys complete each other? It's like when you're with that person, you've found your missing piece. When I was with him, my heart felt so secure and for the first time in so long, I am genuinely filled with happiness and not worries. Not one worry has struck me when I was with him. When in doubt, I'll hold your hand and everything will be alright. When I'm sad, I pout, and you will come around and place your forehead against mine, hold my hands and give me a kiss. You are never good at words but I know what you're trying to convey with ever single action of yours. And I love them. I love how you laugh till you're breathless. I love holding your hands when you drive.  I love it when I tried to let go of your hand and you grabbed it the moment I lose grip. Most importantly of all, I love you.

It's amazing how you can not meet someone for the longest time, but when fate brings you back together, it's as though you guys were never apart. I think that's wonderful. That means there's something special between the both of you. And I'm so so glad I managed to find a love so strong. Though the next time I'll see you is a month away. But like what Chris said, a month for a lifetime of happiness? I guess it's all worthwhile. I think so too. I can't wait, baby, to hug you, kiss you and hold your hands whenever we go :)

I foresee that this post is gonna be wordy. Well, haha one last post before I shut the laptop and resume my packing. Urgh I seriously hate packing stuffs, but what to do. Wishing that I can just go to sleep and when I'll open my eyes, I'll wake up to him hehe. Though I really like taking planes but still, I really can't wait to see him! Another ten hours to go, omg. Ok I'll see him before I even know it :D

Met my darling girlfriends for dinner just now, nothing fancy, just dinner at Mosburger and chit chat for a couple of hours straight. Ya and thanks to ming I had to eat some potato burger alongside with french fries (potato) plus clam chowder (with potato chunks inside) but still hahaha you know I'm only fa fa lao sao. Watched "My girlfriend's an agent" with wantonmee aft that, it was nice and funny lei hahaha. Hopefully when I get there we will have some movies to watch too.

What else, 've got some family problems but thinking of the fact that I'm seeing him tomorrow makes everything ok. Nothing else can bring me down. I'm starting to worry bout tmrw alr, how?! I better go sleep and not think so much, leave all the rest to the one and half hours on the plane later for some serious thoughts.

Friends, take care!!! I'll be back in no time, (with good news!)

time for some tumblr-lovin' : 

This space has been filled with all sorts of emo posts that makes people wants to kill themselves after reading it. But I'm so sorry 'cus the author here isn't in a happy place now so just bear with it. I'm waiting for my sunshine after this rain as well. Can't wait to be truly happy and worry-free, just like before.

Yesterday was heart-breaking, actually it is, everyday. But last night I was hurt to the extent that I couldn't breathe. But I'm really thankful to these 5 people who're my first choice to turn to, and they never ran away - Sam, Casse, Wan, Ming and Venice. Thanks for tolerating all my nonsense and my depressing thoughts. You guys are so supportive, I'm really thankful for all of your existence. I have the most wonderful girlfriends around. Go on, be jealous :)

But later at night everything felt better. It seems so silly but yet it's true that the one who's making you hurt is the only one who can take all the pain away. One phone call and it changes everything. The hurt in my heart went away in an instant and soon my msn was again filled with the long-lost smiley faces. Though I'm afraid that some time soon these days he's going to say another word and all the pain will come back and find me but I really like how I'm feeling now so I'm just hoping that it won't be replaced by pain again.

My sweethearts have been telling me to just stay positive and stop thinking all bout the woes. It'll just bring me down and I think they're right. Today I hasn't cried and I'm truly happy for that even though it seemed like nothing to some of you. I can't wait to see him and there's only another four days to go and I'm really excited. There's nothing else I can do now but hope for the best. I hope all of you here will hope for the best for me too. And I need luck, lots and lots of them. 'Cus this time is my last chance and I'm going all out to get my happiness back.

:)

I believe that two people are connected at the heart. And it doesnt matter what you do, or who you are, or where you live; there are no boundries or barriers. If two people are destined to be together, they will be.

I am envious of couples that can withstand long-distance relationship, and still love each other so much. I'm even envious of couples which broke up and got back together in the end. I thought Lily and Rufus was just a fictional, but as I browsed Facebook, I realized it's not impossible. People around me has gotten back together with each other after breaking up. So, (though I promise to stay positive) if this time round it fails, we may just be next-in-line for someone-up-there's list of "Couples who will get back together and this time round, they won't be separated again list".

:), well who knows right?

"Look, I guarantee that we’ll have tough times. And I guarantee that at some point, one or both of us will want to get out of this thing. But I also guarantee that if I don’t ask you to be mine I’ll regret it for the rest of my life. Because I know in my heart, you’re the only one for me."

Few more days left, TINGYUAN GO GO GO !!!!! 

  Ross: It's just, Rachel and I, we're doing really well now. 

   Phoebe: I know. If you try to make it more, you might wreck it. 

   Ross: Yeah, exactly.

   Phoebe: Right. 

   Phoebe: Or, you might get everything you've wanted since you were 15. 

You might fail if you try, but if you don't try, you will never succeed. 

Wish me luck :) 

I want to say but I won't say it to you. I miss you, goodnight. Miss you so so much. <3

These days, my heart couldn't stop aching. It ached like when we first broke up. It's already been a month, the pain hasn't go away and I don't think it will ever does. You can say a million of things to hurt me, to break my heart into a million tiny pieces, but when it boils down to the one fact that I still love you, it makes me strong again. I know I am stupid to keep wanting to hold onto this thin thread when you have said it that you don't love me anymore, and that you don't want me anymore. But you have your beliefs, I have mine too. I know if this time I'm going to give up just because of the words you say, I'll spend my entire life regretting it. Throughout this relationship, I have listened to you too many times. This time, I'm truly gonna fuck care your opinions, your selfishness and just go get what I want.

If I fail, and fall, and have my heart broken all over again, at least I tried. & then that's gonna be your loss, 'cus I fought for my happiness and you didn't, at all.

100th post! my aim was to be able to post something good for this special post and my wish came true! over the phone, he said something really sweet and i just melted there into a puddle of butter. i love you so so much <3